Florist Story part #1

I had just moved to Chicago and I needed a job, badly. I was staying at my sisters place and she got all pissed when I accidentally set her chair on fire. I was trying to help! Anyway, she had suggested I move. But with no job it was difficult to pay rent.

So I picked up the paper and started looking for a job which required no skills yet had a high pay rate. I found what I was looking for posted under telemarketing! “Do you like to talk? Would you like to talk to people and make money? Please call ### for an appointment” I was like SCORE!

So I called and spoke to some guy and he was really excited and asked if I could come in for an interview right away. Since I had no pressing engagements, I got on my bike and headed over to Halsted St.

I was a little more than a half hour early so I decided to check out some other stores near by. There was a floral shop/garden center called the Village Green that looked cool, so I stopped in. I had just received my certificate of floral design, while completing my horticulture and landscape management degree. So I thought I would see if they were hiring.

I walked in with my bike and was given a dirty look from the little dude behind the counter. I asked if they were hiring and he said, “no, but we are accepting applications” and he handed me a clipboard. So I filled it out and handed it over with my resume, said good bye and split.

I rode up the street to the telemarketing interview and was really looking forward to a high paying and rewarding job. I walked in and a weird guy in a bright red vest greeted me with “Are you Todd??” and I told him I was indeed. He seemed over excited and said something about my voice matching my face. I had no idea how to respond to that. So I smiled and said “thanks man”.

He led me to an office and began explaining the job. Seems it was like the ad said, I would talk on the phone to guys. I was a little confused and asked “what do I talk about? What are we selling?”.

He told me, “we are selling ourselves here! You just talk about whatever pops into your pretty little head”. So I was totally confused and said “huh?”. He suggested we sit in on Brucey's conversation to see what he was talking about.

So we walk into a room and there is a guy talking on the phone. We got a little closer so I could hear the conversation. Turns out Brucey was talking dirty on the phone, which I thought was kind a weird. A few moments later I realized I was standing in a gay sex line call center. Which completely freaked me out and I do not freak easily. I told them that there was no way I could do that and I split.

I rode my bike back to my sisters house and decided to move back to Milwaukee and Gina #2. Screw it, the Chicago experiment had failed. I packed up my stuff into the Tercell and headed north.

No sooner had I arrived in Milwaukee than my sister called to tell me “some queer guy from a garden center wants you to call him about a job as a florist”. I was like SCORE!! and packed up and split for Chicago again!!

End Part #1